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“Do you find me attractive?”

“Who are you asking?”

If someone ever asks me if their butt looks too big, or wants to know how I rate that person over there on a scale of 1 to 10, I always refuse to answer on the grounds that I don’t want to harm the asker’s self image. If you ask someone to ‘rate’ you, or someone else, what you’re really asking is ‘am I seeing the world clearly? or is my perspective way off?’ If someone’s a 7, and someone else thinks they’re a 3, then the 7’er thinks they have low expectations all of a sudden; it never works the other way around somehow. The person who never hands our a rating higher than 5 never thinks they have high expectations. So if everyone is to be confident with themselves, the best answer is really, “I don’t know. Do you think it makes your butt look big?” The more I’ve lived, the more I’ve found my opinion on someone’s butt size doesn’t matter.

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