What’s on your mind?

Every living creature dies alone. That sort of thing.

That’s not always true. I’ve heard sometimes big groups of people, like in cults, come together and have mass suicides, like a big suicide party–oh and don’t forget about natural disasters. Lots of people die together in those.

Thanks. I feel way better now.

Well don’t drag your shit onto me. I’m feeling pretty good right now and I don’t want to deal with your existential crisis. I’ll deal with it when I get depressed on my own accord.

You could have just said that first. You don’t have to be such a jerk about it.

I was starting to feel bad, so I had to knock you down a few pegs, which made me feel better I gotta say.

Haven’t you heard of sharing the load to make it lighter?

Haven’t you heard about turds in punch bowls? I don’t want your shit in my mouth.

But we never talk about this kind of stuff. No one does.

And for a reason. People want to feel good. Yeah, we all know we’re all going to die, but we’d rather just distract ourselves from it than spend time thinking about it and dealing with it. Why do you think people are always on their phones doing dumb shit when they could have a quiet moment to reflect? Why do you think we distract ourselves from thought in general?

Yeah. I guess we’ve kind of gotten soft. No one wants to do the hard mental work to find true satisfaction; they just want to play fucking candy crush and feel happy for beating the next level or watch some fucking cats doing cute cat things.

Well yeah, that’s just the way it is, so deal with it.

I’m trying.

Well you’re sucking at it. Try harder.

But if I just distract myself it won’t actually change anything.

…I’ll give you some advice that my great grandpa gave me before he died, as long as you promise to shut up.

Ok. Sure.

When you feel like you are going to die — don’t die; and you will survive.

He said that?

Well, I’m translating, but that’s the gist.

Bullshit.

Well it’s what he said. Now shut the fuck up and eat some ice cream.

There’s no way he said that.

He was on the forefront of wisdom, what do you want me to say?

How about what he actually said?

But that is what he said.

I object! You expect me to believe this ill-conceived hearsay?

Why not? Everything is hearsay anyways. You wouldn’t even know how old you are if someone didn’t tell you. Everything can be true or false; it just matters if you believe it. You see, there’s a certain point in life when you realize that you’re not the judge. You don’t decide what happens, so you try to be the lawyer for a while, arguing about why it happens and all the time-consuming, convoluted questions that go along with that. But then you realize that you’re a crappy lawyer and are only confusing yourself, so you take another step back. Your real job is to be the jury, and decide what you want to believe. Because believing is the only choice we have, and the only decision worth giving a damn about. So don’t tell me you’re going to die, and don’t ask me why it will happen; just tell me what you’re going to do about it.

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24 thoughts on “

  1. skinnyuz2b says:

    You’re right. It is so strange, but true. We only know our age through hearsay.

    Thank you for visiting my site and enjoying ‘Chickens Never Forget.’

  2. triksijulyan says:

    Reblogged this on Oblivion. and commented:
    And I quote, “Because believing is the only choice we have, and the only decision worth giving a damn about.”

  3. Lesley Dawson says:

    ‘Everything can be true or false; it just matters if you believe it.’
    I like that! Having something to believe in really matters. I love the way you wrote this post – such a thought-provoking subject put over in a comical way. :)

  4. This is so true…it all starts with our thinking.

  5. benzeknees says:

    “I don’t think about dying – it’s the last thing I want to do.” I forget where I saw this saying, but it’s how I try to live my life.

  6. jimgramze says:

    First I like or don’t like something, then I rationalize the reasons. That is my reality.

  7. This made me smile. Happy September and first-day-back-to-school.
    I like the way you worked through this subject.

  8. “I want you tooooo live….” Dr. Frederick Frankstein, “Young Frankenstein.”

  9. myaspeeks says:

    HIL FUCKINLARIOUS as always
    And here ive been thinking im playing candy crush cause im bored
    Gee thanks for the wake up….now what do I do
    O well there’s always twitter

  10. Marisha says:

    Brilliantly written. Loved it so very much.

  11. LOL of course it’s like that. It’s like the weather, everyone complains about it but no one does or can do a damn thing about it. So which is better – sitting around bitching about it or accepting it and making the most of it?

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