Tag Archives: eat

Stop it, Pac-man! You’re doing it wrong!

 

 

 

pac man test_2

This is my first attempt at making an animated gif. Any technical advice would be greatly appreciated.
Sorry for ruining Pac-man.

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Avocado Refrigerator

We can’t attempt to compartmentalize things in life; put the oranges here, the greens in a separate fridge with a different humidity than the cheese will allow, and give the avocados get their own special fridge. Of course each food has its own ideal way it can be stored to maintain optimum freshness and maximize shelf life, but if you catered to the specific needs of each individual food, you’d exhaust your resources, your expenses, and yourself by all the running around you’d have to do just to make dinner. You might think you’re doing a good job of organizing, and this might happen elsewhere, too. “There’s too many files in this folder. I know–I’ll give them all their own folder!” So now instead of fixing the problem, there’s “too many folders in this drawer! I can’t find anything!”

While trying to be fair to the food, you are being unfair to yourself. You need to treat yourself with some respect; and actually by stuffing everything into the same fridge at a uniform temperature and humidity, it’s more respectful to the food too. No one gets special treatment so they know not to ask for it. It’s nothing unusual; it’s just the best option. The food might whine and complain, but who doesn’t complain every once in a while? The food doesn’t care if you do anything about its complaints, it just wants to vent. You might say, “This quinoa is going straight to my hips,” and then eat it anyway. Same thing. Otherwise, if you cater to every food and try to please them all with their own special climate, it won’t work; it never does. And all you’ll be left with is an empty avocado refrigerator.

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Caterpillar

Hollow and vacant he froze there at last
—alone, abandoned— a shell of his past.
The living cage, the bane of this man,
releases his soul in new form cast.

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Cake

Analyzing a joke is like telling someone cake is unhealthy. You don’t ever hear a comedian say, “does this joke make me look fat?” Just laugh and eat the cake. You can’t talk and chew at the same time.

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